Classic Kathleen Givens- as published on 9/27/07
Or are you a celebrity who wants to drive irresponsibly and endanger the rest of the driving world, even get away with murder? Have I got a place for you! Yes, Los Angeles has now become the official Get Away with Murder and Mayhem capital of the world. Do you have a wife who’s annoying you? A girlfriend you’re weary of? Do you want to bash into other peoples’ cars and not be held responsible? Then come on out to California, LA, of course, where you might be booked and even put on trial, but you won’t spend any appreciable time in the Big House. You might find our court system a tad strange, but rest assured, your needs will be met,
and in a fashion that no ordinary citizen could expect. We guarantee that after some preliminary small annoyances, you too will be smoking a cigar in Florida – or right here in LA, if you choose, where the media will applaud your grace under fire. You’ll be free to drink and drive again, or do drugs of your choices and hit the freeway. Or even cash your retirement checks while searching for the real murderer. And you’ll get millions of dollars of free press during this time! Think of what that would cost you if you’d not behaved badly! Grab your bike, hop a plane, jump in your car – chase down your publicist’s mother even – but get here and soon, before the waiting list gets long! Now serving Phil Spector.
Sherri adds: Wouldn’t Kath not be surprised by Lindsay Lohan’s early release from prison and now suggested early release from rehab? Or Charlie Sheen’s complete lack of charges from supposedly threatening and beating his wife? Ah, California. But I think And whatever happened to Phil Spector anyway? Is he still in jail, awaiting a new trial, or has that happened?
What celebrity do you think will run into trouble next? Who is the most troubled celebrity? If you could adopt any troubled celebrity and help them on their road to the straight and narrow, who would it be?
{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }
I just saw a list of celebrities who owe tax money. Surprising. Does it creep up on you? Do you hire bad accountants? Do you have that much money that you just don’t know, oops, you owe a few million? Politicians do it, too. What is up with that? I think the average joe has this kind of stuff under control, so why not the rich and famous?
I’d be scared to death not to pay my taxes. Don’t they come after you and take away all your things when you don’t pay?
I’ve wondered that, too–how do you have no clue that you’re millions of dollars in debt to the IRS (and elsewhere?). I suppose some are negligent, but I think alot of those celebs were taken advantage of by unscrupulous financial planners/managers, which is really horrible. Remember when Billy Joel lost like $50 million to his buisness manager (who happened to be his ex-wife’s brother–probably it wasn’t a great idea to keep him around after the marriage ended). Kevin Bacon and his wife reportedly lost millions in the Bernie Madoff ponzi scheme, and poor Nicolas Cage apparently got royally fleeced by his financial advisers.
Jacquie, so true. The trouble with trusting the wrong people. It seems like $50 million later is a little slow to catch on, but I don’t have that kind of money to lose, so who knows.
On the one hand I feel sorry for Lilo–addiction problems are horrifying and destroy lives and families, but on the other hand, I’m pretty tired of all her drama. It’s pretty clear her parents are not good role models, but she’s not a child anymore. At what point is it time for a person to take responsibilty for their own bad behavior? She’s not 14–she’s 24. I think it stopped being mom and dad’s fault a long time ago. There are plenty of people out there who have terrible parents but manage to make something of themselves (remember the Liz Murray story? The homeless girl who got to Harvard?), just as there are plenty of kids out there who have really great parents who have bent over backwards to provide good lives for them and set good examples for them, yet these kids STILL turn to drugs and make messes of their lives. I wish Lilo well–I hope she takes stock of her life and grows up and starts making good decisions.
Wow–I guess it IS a cranky Monday, LOL!
You’re right, Jacquie. She’s all grown up. Time to take charge of her own life and make some smart decisions. I know plenty of kids who grew up in chaos and turned into some very fine adults.
My mother and I just had this conversation yesterday! How her parents are horrible, but she is old enough to know better and to take responsibility.
I still have a soft spot for LiLo. Her early movies are some of my favs, and she was such an adorable (and seemingly smart!) kid. And then I look at her parents and think, man, that girl didn’t have a chance. At the same time, though, I want her to look at herself, put her idiot parents behind her, and act like a freaking grown-up.
Most of the time, though, I don’t think about her or other celebs at all. It’s just soooo much noise.
There’s something that goes with that kind of fame, I think. Or that type of personality is drawn to the celeb lifestyle. I saw a lot of it when I worked in Hollywood. At one point my firm repped a Major Star (at the time) who refused to leave his home (a hotel room–he lived there) for depositions. He made everyone go there, and then he refused to get dressed. So he was deposed in his boxers and bathrobe. Not exactly bad behavior by today’s standards, but telling, I think…..
Ooh we all want to know who now! But yes, Lilo’s early movies were fun.
I am no longer surprised by celebs behaving badly, only ‘pleasantly’ surprised by those who do not. I saw where Neil Patrick Harris and his partner were expecting a baby via surrogate and thought to myself ‘class act’. Did Neil drive drunk, or spew racist invectives, or blame his manager/parent/last romance involvement for anything? No.
I think the antics of the people behaving badly have dampened my enjoyment of movies, made me more cynical about every mention in the gossip columns. Planted for PR purposes, or not?
I am usually crabby on Mondays.
I try to just think of the movie as the movie, but it’s getting harder and harder. Tom C’s latest looks cute in the trailers, but I haven’t gone. And not just b/c with the kids Despicable Me is a more likely choice but b/c I can’t get TC’s recent weirdness out of my head. Sigh.
And mondays were made for crabbiness
And Mel Gibson? Off the list for awhile. Not saying I won’t watch, just not right now and who knows when. Not in the mood. Neil Patrick Harris is so talented and likable. Happy for him and his partner, seems they will be wonderful fathers. I like it when celebrity good news comes out.
I think some of these troubled people just need to get out of the spotlight and move to Iowa or Wyoming, somewhere quiet and beautiful, no paparazzi, in some cases no family members. Others, obviously, need even more than that.
Speaking of California, we haven’t heard from Parrot in a while. Are you out there, Parrot? Everything well?
Oh goodness no— we don’t want them in Wyoming…. There are enough of them in Montana.
Maybe a nice little island somewhere out of the limelight, like the land for Misfit Toys in the Rudolph Christmas show.
How about Alcatraz?
LOL, Jacquie.